By Lisa Shumate
Guidance for Young Adults
There are more than 45 million men and women in their 20’s, trying to figure out this important phase of their lives. Striking out on their own for the first time, they face a period of self-discovery and self-doubt. In “Always and Never,” Lisa Shumate shares timeless advice that will always matter.
Practicing these 20 truths will build a strong foundation for the future, and set a high standard for your life and relationships. This book and companion journal will help guide, inform, and inspire you to realize your dreams and potential.
Everybody seeks happiness in life, but few of us ever get to experience it in its purest form. Lisa Shumate is one of the leading experts in the field of lifestyle improvement and the pursuit of happiness, and her advice for a happier life will change everything for you.
How can I train my mind to be positive?
Everything begins with a process of self-knowledge. Positivity isn’t something you have, but rather something you earn with time. At its core, positivity draws its strength from confidence and self-esteem. The more confident you are in your capabilities to overcome all obstacles, the more optimistic you will become with regards to your chances of success in life.
To get there, you need to learn how to train your brain to visualize success as the only realistic goal. If you can’t comprehend failure, everything you will do from that point on will be just another step towards success; including failing. And it is this ability to recollect yourself after falling that will turn you into a successful individual in life.
What is an optimistic person like?
The optimist is the risk-taker – the individual who does not understand failure the way a pessimist does. For an optimist, success is a ladder, with each failure representing, paradoxically, one step up the ladder. That’s because optimists take risks, fail, learn from their mistakes, and improve their approaches next time. Optimists will soon learn the art of self-improvement, which is something a pessimist will never do, simply because pessimists avoid taking risks.
The secret to becoming an optimist begins with envisioning your goals. As Lisa Shumate will teach you, there are ways to train your brain and trick it into seeing the glass half full in every situation, no matter how desperate. Studies have shown that the human mind cannot differentiate, at a conceptual level, between what happens and what we imagine or wish to happen. It goes to show that we alone build our reality and, so long as we delude ourselves with the prospect of happiness, happiness will become real.
How do I become happy?
You first start with understanding the thoughts and emotions that define you. Happiness is a state of mind; not something you get from the outside, but rather something you achieve from within yourself. This is why so many people are happy and content in situations that seem desperate to others. It is the main reason why some people claim that money doesn’t bring happiness. Everybody defines the concept of happiness differently, according to their own vision of themselves and the world around them.
To become happy, you must first rewire your view of the world, change your mindset, and slowly overcome your fears and anguishes. Van Gogh once said, “I dream my paintings, and then I pain what I dream,” and that’s probably the best advice for a happier life that you can get.
Lisa Shumate will teach you how to take your dreams and turn them into reality. Your own reality, which will soon change the world around you.
There's no doubt that in today's world, the only constant is change. Everything is changing all the time! Culture, technology, the workplace, and even our home lives; it's all changing rapidly before our eyes! Further, as we move deeper into the 21st Century, we are entering, and are already living in, unparalleled times. The pressures, temptations, and adversities that young adults face today aren't anything like what most Millennials and Gen Xers encountered in their formative years. And while there are certain evergreen principles that can guide people of all ages and situations, the best guidance for young adults takes these changes into account.
What's the Best Guidance for Young Adults?
With the technology boom, the world has become smaller and smaller. Somehow, the devices that connect us have also disconnected us. While everyone has a smartphone in their hand, fewer people are finding meaningful friendships and relationships than before. That is why depression, anxiety, and suicide are on the rise in America. But what if there was a book that told you how to be happy? 'Always and Never: 20 Truths for a Happy Heart' does just that! The truth is; anyone can obtain happiness by doing two things:
2. Doing for others
Is Forgiveness the Cornerstone of a Healthy, Happy, and Successful Adulthood?
As children, we are usually forgiven for our errors readily by the world around us. People understand that children and adolescents are full of hormones and come standard with hard heads. One of the reasons that transitioning from teens to twenties can be so difficult for many is that the world around us, including our families, stop forgiving us so easily as we get older and start holding us accountable for our decisions.
At the same time that the world stops forgiving our errors, we must find the courage to forgive the world. The truth is; we live in an imperfect world. Good things happen to bad people, and bad things happen to good people. When you realize that your parents, your siblings, your relatives, your friends, your peers, your educators, and anyone else who may have hurt you when you were younger is a mere human, prone to do both good and bad things; forgiveness then becomes a lot easier.
The Art of Self-Forgiveness
Most of us have done things that we are ashamed of, whether those things are of a sexual nature or something else. Further, a lot of us have grown up being ridiculed, abused, and hurt by the people who were supposed to love, nurture, and protect us. It is natural for humans to personalize such treatment on a subconscious level, but that trauma never goes away! Forgiving is not forgetting; forgiving is letting go, and it starts with forgiving yourself.
Forgiving yourself isn't as simple as making the decision not to feel bad about the past anymore. Forgiving yourself doesn't happen overnight either. Self-forgiveness is a process that takes time. There's no way around it. The process starts with making a list of people we have harmed (including ourselves) and then making amends when and where possible. Forgiveness and doing or others is truly the best guidance for young adults.
The book Always and Never: 20 Truths for a Happy Heart teaches Positive Psychology exercises to disrupt negative routines and thought patterns. Positive psychology might sound like a feel-good personal development ploy to some, but Positive Psychology is actually a scientific field that is used to help people attain more personal and professional satisfaction and well-being.
Always and Never: 20 Truths for a Happy Heart promotes several of these Positive Psychology exercises to disrupt negative routines and thought patterns. Pick up your copy today, and begin your journey of personal development.
Letter of Self-Compassion
Positive Psychology exercises only become valuable when they're put into practice. While the book contains several exercises, we thought we'd bring you two Positive Psychology tools that you can apply right away.
The first is a self-compassion letter. Self-compassion simply means that you treat yourself with esteem, care, and concern when confronted with your own errors and failures rather than putting yourself down or beating yourself up. There are three different components of a self-compassion letter, including:
2. Common humanity
To write yourself a letter of self-compassion, you are going to start with a part of yourself - whether it be a physical or personality trait - that you often criticize, dislike, and or are ashamed of. Then, you will write at length about how it makes you feel, using stories, examples, images in your mind, and anything else associated with the feeling to describe it.
Next, you are going to think about a friend or a relative who is unconditionally loving and supportive (imagine one if you don't have one). You will write your letter of self-compassion from the perspective of this friend, thinking of how he or she supports and encourages you. It's important to just let the words flow and not worry about structuring or phrasing. Set the letter aside for a half-hour, and then come back and read it. Let the words of compassion and support sink in and accept it, even reading it in your friend's voice.
Take a Daily Vacation
Research has shown that people experience more happiness and a better overall state of well-being by increasing the number of positive experiences in their daily lives, not by increasing the intensity of positive experiences. This is important because many people go through life trying to intensify happy feelings from relationships and other means, which isn't always possible. Instead of doing this, take a daily vacation.
Choose a different vacation every day. This can include going for a walk, going for a ride, taking a hot bubble bath, chatting with your bestie, watching the sunrise while sipping on your favorite morning beverage, or whatever else your imagination contrives. Choose whatever you enjoy. Just remember, your daily vacation is your time to relax and set aside your fears and worries for a while. Be present in the moment, and notice the sensations and how they make you feel.
These are just a couple of exercises to disrupt negative thoughts, and the book goes into greater detail about them, also detailing several other exercises that can create a positive state of being.